Oh my crap, it is sunny up in the air.

I feel the plane losing altitude, and of course I decide calmly that I will like to watch our plummet to the earth because this feeling is not a normal turbulence feeling. I am certain that there is something horribly wrong. So I open the shade and look out that oval window; this way I can be clear that I am about to die and quickly repent all my sins because I am Catholic, and we get a free out like that; however, I am immediately blinded by the sun's intense power. I see neither air nor sky. I have no idea if the plane is about to crash.

If I do a safety, "Please forgive me God" prayer, then I will have to not do those sins anymore. I cannot just apologize for being a big 'ol lezzie, and then live to make out with girls happily and expect to get into that all inclusive heaven I keep hearing about. God will catch onto my lie. He will know that I was just trying to get into heaven because my grandma Ella is there, and let's face it, Ella was awesome. He will know that I actually like being gay, and I sin knowingly. I think that is worse then a sin of passion. Does St. Peter go by federal law?

So have to make sure I am really about to die before I cash in on my "Forgive me Father for I have sinned..." card. Stupid sun is so freaken bright that I think 43% of the plane (that would be about 20 of us because it is a small ass plan from Atlanta to Birmingham) is hissing in shock and fear of the pain caused by the light.

I take this this light as "The Light" (you know, god's light), and I do not like it. Maybe heaven isn't worth it. I think I will continue to play "Lesbian or MSB" and introduce myself to the former with out any of that Irish Catholic guilt, unless the latter is Justin Beiber then I will introduce myself to him and feel guilty as all get out because being his fan is just straight up embarrassing.

(these are just a few of Mac's roommate's crosses)